June 2003

10th June 2003

TV Licensing
Bristol BS98 1TL

Dear Sir or Madam

This really is too much. Once again I must waste my time writing to you. It is just 8 weeks since I last wrote, explaining, yet again, that there is no TV at this address. Yet the correspondence that arrived today was addressed "To the occupier", as though you were not perfectly well aware of my identity.

This one informs me that I am going to be visited by a Licensing inspector. I phoned your organisation forthwith and spoke to a somewhat clueless young man called Martin. I pointed out my objection to letting a stranger into my house to snoop around for something that will not be found because it is not here. Martin tried to suggest that this was necessary, because anyone with a television could "just phone up and say they don't have a TV, and if we accepted that, then no-one would pay their licence."

Surely that is your problem, not mine: those people are criminals, whereas I am not -- to which you have no evidence to the contrary. It flies in the face of natural justice for me to have to prove my innocence rather than you having to prove my guilt, which is how the justice system in this country normally functions.

Martin then tried to reassure me that it was a 5-minute visit, with the inspector looking "just into the living area". I said that I would not permit such entry, but that I had no objection to your placing a detector van outside my house for a fortnight if it so pleased you. He contacted me back after speaking to some internal department with a sinister name -- Enforcement Department? -- and informed me that this was not a possibility, since the vans are highly visible, and that it would be possible for a licence evader to simply avoid turning on the television set for an hour until the van went away.

I again fail to see how this is my problem. Presumably your vans could stay longer. Presumably they do not have to have "TV Licensing Authority" painted on them, but could be anonymous. According to your website, your inspectors carry hand-held gadgets that enable them to pick up the local oscillator signal. I would have thought it was perfectly possible for your inspectors to verify from the adjacent street whether or not I'm receiving a TV signal without my even noticing the inspector is there. Sending someone to my door smacks of intimidation.

Martin then revealed that the inspection could last for fully 10 minutes, and would take in not just living room, but kitchen, study and bedrooms. The entire house in fact. He added that the cupboard under the stairs and the attic would not be inspected, as though that would somehow make it more acceptable. It is not acceptable. It is grotesque. I will not allow admission.

Martin attempted to suggest that by co-operating, i.e. rolling over and letting you violate my privacy and property, I would receive no further correspondence. Since you can't even keep track of my name just two months since I last wrote to you, this seems extremely unlikely. A television-free colleague of mine was subjected to a house inspection 3 times in 2 months -- hardly a model of efficient record keeping on your part.

Please stop wasting your time and money and leave me in peace.

Yours sincerely,

Erika Sigvallius